Subject: No One Is Braver, Sir
At the New York Young Republican Club gala on Saturday, Orange Jesus told the audience one of his "a general told me, sir" stories, which like the proverbial fish tale becomes a bigger and bigger whopper with each rendition.

TRUMP: "I went onto that [debate] stage just a few days later, and a general, who's a fantastic general, actually said to me, 'Sir, I’ve been on the battlefield, men have gone down on my left and on my right, I stood on hills where soldiers were killed, but I believe the bravest thing I've ever seen was the night you went onto that stage with Hillary Clinton after what happened [the pussy tape was played], and then that woman asked you the first question about it, and [you] said 'locker room talk.'"

Orange Jesus, who lied about having bone spurs to get out of the draft during the Vietnam War, is braver than any man or woman who ever died in battle because he had the courage to walk onto a debate stage and lie.

Now imagine a democratic candidate for any office -- hell, or a republican for that matter -- who dodged the draft five times claiming to be braver than fallen combat heroes, the war dead -- and how quickly and rightly such an ugly and absurd claim would end their political career.

But his followers just bobble their heads and murmur, "Praise Orange Jesus, no one is braver and he will save us."

But it's not a cult.

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