I do think it is a rather useless asset and does represent some awful impulses: greed, corruption, lack of transparency etc. But this populist movement seems to only be gaining momentum sadly.

If only a part of a larger basket of securities, I think why not allocate a sliver to calm the FOMO?

Let me calm that FOMO for you. For a number of reasons that are unlikely to change, Bitcoin sales transactions are typically look like this: You send cash to the exchange. The exchange uses your cash to buy a stable coin (usually Tether) and puts it in your account. You then use Tether to buy Bitcoin. Then the opposite on the way out.

In short, Tether provides the liquidity needed for Bitcoin transactions. Again, unlikely to change. Tether claims to back its coins 1:1 with real dollar assets. However, Tether has never been audited, is domiciled in the Cayman Islands away from prying eyes, has had previous regulatory trouble, and has made provably false claims about its banking relationships.

Do you trust Tether? I don't. If there is a Bitcoin sell off (which there will be eventually) and Tether isn't backed 1:1 (which it isn't), there might not be enough exit liquidity and your Bitcoin will be stranded on the exchange. That is, if the exchange itself survives. Quadriga, Mt. Gox, FTX, Voyager, etc. weren't so lucky in previous sell offs.

Before you can say "self custody," how do you buy or sell without an exchange? You almost can't do it. So by buying Bitcoin you're taking a lot of institutional risk. And that's assuming Bitcoin isn't in a speculative bubble in the first place, which is not a good assumption.