The way the asylum laws are being applied right now, I could be a citizen from anywhere, jump on a plane to Mexico and hire a coyote to take me over the border. If I got caught by CBP I say the magic asylum words and I'm paroled into the country (something else he's not acknowledging).

Again, none of that is true. If you got caught by CBP being a "citizen from anywhere" with nothing but a few "magic asylum words," you'd almost certainly fail your credible fear interview and be deported/detained immediately. You're simply mistaken that the process works like this. The credible fear interview lasts for more than an hour (between 1.5-4 hours), and about a third of folks fail (and thus go into expedited removal and don't get into the country). And if you're just making everything up, you're almost certainly going to be one of the folks that doesn't get released into the country for a court date a few years down the road even if you pass your CFI.

If you think there's a rote incantation that allows you to get through the process, then you just really don't know how the system works, Dope.

aila.org - Aila files