I mean, c'mon, these are over the top, right? There's just no way any of this can be true. What kind of pervert would do the despicable things in these latest allegations?

Well, wait a second; maybe someone could begin to believe there's some truth to these allegations if, for example, a man...

-- Was credibly accused of sexual assault by more than two dozen women.

-- Was unfaithful to every one of his wives.

-- Bragged publicly about grabbing women by the p*ssy.

-- Agreed that his own daughter was "a nice piece of ass," was photographed with her in sexually provocative poses, and talked about dating her.

-- Was on video ogling teen girls, and laughing and whispering about it with Jeffrey Epstein.

-- Had Jeffrey Epstein refer to him as his best friend for a decade.

-- Wrote birthday wishes to Jeffrey Epstein, saying "A pal is a wonderful thing. Happy birthday and may every day be another wonderful secret."

-- Wished Epstein's accomplish "well" and had his administration move her to a Club Fed.

-- Bragged about walking in on naked teenage girls at his own beauty contest.

-- Had sex with a porn star and a Playboy model, then paid them hush money during a presidential campaign.

-- Had David Pecker catch and kill stories of his sexual activities.

Then, maybe then, you just might think, "Well, maybe there's something to these Epstein files after all, and there's a reason they fought tooth and nail to keep them hidden."

But that's pretty far-fetched, right?

Oh wait.

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